Bend Over Bitch: Strap-On Humiliation Fun

An Essay In The Erotic Humiliation Exploration

Series By Miz Ava

 

Strap-on humiliation. There is nothing quite as sexually taboo as engaging the male submissive in a form of strap-on sex. Let’s face it, for all intents and purposes, when we think of sexual intercourse, it is traditionally with the notion that the woman is built for the act of penetration. Sure, male/female couples also have anal sex, but again, it is typically with the woman being on the “receiving” end.

Kinkier couples, however, know that this is way of thinking is much too inhibiting and dominant females know that when a male partner is willing to give himself to her anally, he is performing a most powerful act of submission.

 

The Ass as a Taboo Place (Or, You Want to Put *That* Where??)

 

Historically and culturally speaking, the rear end is a typically a place on the body associated with an aura of “the forbidden”. Sure, we can admire a shapely or curvy bottom on a male or female. Yet, based in the context of its mere biological function, the ass is a private area that should be refrained from inclusion in any other activity besides its most basic, anatomical, utilitarian business.

We learn early in life that the rear end is a place of shame, embarrassment and filth. The ass is created as a source for “exiting”, therefore it isn’t “natural” to want to put objects into one’s butt, for Pete’s sake! Framing the male’s bottom as an area for sexual indulgence immediately calls to mind notions of homosexuality and immorality. Anal sex of any kind is often viewed as an act of sheer lewdness and to this day, in some states anal sex is illegal.

 

You Say Taboo, I Say Ooooh

 

It’s nothing new to say that because something is considered to be taboo, it often is transformed into a desire or even a point of fixation. Human nature is like that; tell us something is “wrong” or that we shouldn’t want to do something, and yup, now we want it that much more.

Kind of like driving by a car wreck…you feel like you *shouldn’t* look and yet you are craning your neck as you pass by to catch a glimpse. It’s almost as if we have a need to be exposed to that which is dark, forbidden and possibly unpleasant. In his book “Dark Eros: The Imagination of Sadism”, Thomas Moore suggests that these dark images and desires are given to us by Nature as a necessary part of our very souls and it is our task to explore and contemplate these necessities.

Wanting to do something just because we’re told not to becomes simplistic when viewed within Moore’s framework. There is a catharsis we inherently seek and a great value discovered in being able to delve into these repressed, taboo mysteries that call out to us. That which revolts us also has the potential to heal us.

 

Strap On Sex: The Great Equalizer

 

Getting a man to bend over and take it in the ass from a woman is a sexy, though somewhat radical act. The very psychologically charged dynamics in a strap-on humiliation exchange are possibly what makes this activity so erotically appealing to both men and women. Many men who enjoy strap on play especially love it when they are reminded by their dominant female partner just how perverted and nasty they are for wanting to be penetrated and taken by a woman in this way.

Referring to his bum as a cunt or pussy while sliding that dildo inside of him completely shifts the power to the woman as his penetrator, the owner of his ass. A man who gives up his ass to a woman is engaging in an ultimate form of submission; he has placed all control and trust into his partner’s hands. He is reduced to a hole to be penetrated and used and the resulting role reversal is quite intense and pleasurable for all involved. This form of objectification intensifies the humiliation factor tenfold.

 

Other Forms of Strap-On Humiliation

 

Backing up just a bit (pun fully intended), strap-on humiliation with submissive males is not limited to only anal play. In fact, for the novice strap on player, it might even be wise to introduce the strap on toy in a progressive fashion. Males can be made to orally service the dildo while it is attached and harnessed to his female partner.

Teaching the submissive how to use his mouth effectively and fellate the strap on cock is a profound exercise in domination and humiliation. Positioning the male on his knees and encouraging him to kiss, lick and suck on the dildo reinforces his feelings of surrendering and obedience. Again, the power dynamic is eroticized and emphasized with the female assuming the more masculine role in this kind of exchange.

The male can also be dressed in female clothing, especially sexy or slutty lingerie to push those gender boundaries even further. An especially nice touch is to paint the male’s mouth with lipstick or lip gloss prior to guiding that strap on cock to his lips.

 

I’m a Male Who Likes Strap On Play, Does This Mean I Might Be Gay?

 

It’s a common myth to assume any male who enjoys strap on humiliation must be gay. While some men who are on the receiving end of strap on sex games may like to fantasize about being anally penetrated by a male or even a shemale (a chick with a dick), bottom line (yet another pun that is fully intended) is most of these guys prefer that there be a woman on the giving end. Sexual identity is not something that can be suddenly switched on or off just because a person is interested in exploring different ways of experiencing sexual pleasure.

There are definitely men who like to be told they are a “faggot” for taking it in the butt during the strap-on humiliation scene, but that’s more of a mindfuck that works in the context of play and means nothing more, nothing less in relation to one’s sexual orientation.

 

“End” Notes on Strap-On Humiliation

 

Strap-on humiliation and play can be a hot way to explore domination and submission exchanges between a man and a woman. Role play and role reversal games can actually be healthy ways to experience and celebrate one’s sexuality. If you are a male who is considering trying strap on sex with a partner, the most important thing to keep in mind is to pace yourself. Ideally you have a female partner who knows what she is doing, or even if you’re both new to strap on play, you should at least be able to communicate your needs adequately to each other.

In an upcoming fetish exploration essay, the topic of Anal Play Fetishes will be covered and this will provide some tips on how to ease into the realm of anal games. Until then, take it slow, and don’t attempt to jump right into a strap on scenario with a ten inch dildo for your first experience. That would just be foolish and the last thing you want is to tear something very delicate. Don’t be afraid to communicate your limits with your female partner and most importantly, relax, bend over and let your strap-on humiliation fantasies be fulfilled.

Reference Cited

Moore, T. Dark Eros: The Imagination of Sadism, Putnam, CT: Spring Publications,1990.

 

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