Sensual Humiliation. When people hear the word humiliation used in reference to a sexual fetish, they tend to think of what is known as hardcore humiliation, verbal insults and the like, but not all humiliation is hardcore. Humiliation can also be very subtle and sensual; an incredible turn-on.
What is it that makes humiliation such a turn-on for some? Why do things that would normally embarrass or humiliate a person sometimes excite them sexually? Almost everybody has experienced at least mild erotic humiliation at one time or another. Even those who are not normally turned on by humiliation sometimes experience a sexual spark when something embarrassing or humiliating happens to them. When that happens, they are usually quite surprised and begin to wonder what is wrong with them that something so humiliating can evoke a sexual thrill.
It should be no surprise that pain, both physical and emotional, can be so exhilarating. We’ve all heard the phrase hurts so good, but do we really know where it comes from? Is there really such a phenomenon, or is it something one of those BDSM lifestyle sado-masochist people made up in order to get people to view masochism in a better light?
Rest assured that there is a scientific and neurological reason why humiliation can hurt so good. The area of the brain that processes sexual pleasure is in very close proximity to the area of the brain that processes physical and emotional pain. Intense emotion derived from either pleasure or pain can trigger synapses in both areas of the brain, combining to create the bittersweet combination of pleasure and pain that prompted the phrase “hurts so good.”
Now that we’ve established how humiliation can be erotic, let’s talk about what makes humiliation sensual. When people hear the term humiliation in a sexual context, they tend to think of the more hardcore types of humiliation, like verbal insults, degradation, objectification, etc. While some do prefer this type of humiliation, most erotic humiliation is sensual in nature. In nearly every fetish, every aspect of BDSM, and even in what we typically think of as “vanilla sex,” sensual humiliation plays an underlying role. Remember the first time you gave or received oral sex? How “dirty” it seemed? And the very fact that it was “dirty” excited you more than anything?
Hardcore humiliation often involves hurling insults and calling names, but sensual humiliation is more of an implied humiliation. Sensual humiliation is more about what isn’t being said. Instead of ridiculing a man with a small penis by telling him it’s a dicklette, a baby carrot dick, or any other number of humiliating terms, a sensual humiliation Mistress would take one look at his small penis and say, “Let’s see how good you are with your tongue.”
Sensual humiliation is often accomplished through certain looks, body language, and little nuances in the tone of the voice. Situations themselves can even be sensually humiliating. How many times have been masturbating and had a fleeting thought of what would happen if your significant other walked in and caught you? You would probably die of embarrassment if she really did walk in and catch you, yet the whole time you were masturbating, that very thought kept erotic thrills coursing through your veins, didn’t it?
Though we don’t always realize it, sensual humiliation occurs in nearly every sexual situation. In the afterglow of your next sexual escapade, stop and reflect on what made it so pleasurable for you. The answer may just surprise you.